HaYaBuSa ヨシムラ...

another tiring day

2006-06-07T22:55:00.000+08:00

just realise it's been a long long time since i last blog. Feel lk blogging now cz gt alot of tings to sae but duno where to start. haiz...derek's on duty today..so i ended up walking home myself frm hg pt after wrk...i din expect to see him when i saw his bro... while i was tinking wad to sae or do when i saw him and surprisely...wifout me tinking..he was sitting there and shk... lucky his back faces me..if not i tink he will notice is me walking frm behind..anywae i tink he din manage to catch my face and din noe i was walking frm behind him... but then agn..i actually wanted to tell him not to shk so much...but it will be awkard lor.. alwaz nv contact or tok to him then suddenly so concern over him..haiz...perhaps if fate allows... i will have the courage to tok to him agn...

2006-01-20T00:54:00.000+08:00

Oops.. it's beeen 1 mth since i last blog..and forget abt the previous entry.. the fotos sux..coz i duno how to format leh.. aiyah..dear also no time help wif all these le... hmfpf.... haiya... so bz leh..nowadaes... but the ting is i duno wad exactly am i bz wif.. well... besides that..i've finally conquered my so many desires.. coz i've just bought 1 of my many fav perfume.. Ralph Lauren Cool.. hehehe... I tell myself to buy another bottle of perfume somewhere in feb when my pay gets credited to my a/c.. haiz.. actually i also wanted to buy Samsung E730 fer myself as CNY present..but then all StarHub has already run out of stk of this fone.. and i din wan to change to other svs providers lehz... haiz ya... well..many things happen last yr... but dun haf time to blog leh... then nowadaes me and dear alwaz go msia wif SL and his gang in the middle of the nite .... so sian... spore too small le anywae... me plan to go genting or HK wif dear this june...maybe... HK abit far yet..coz he still serving NS mahz.. tink genting... its cold up there and we can cuddle each other tight..hehe... ..kk..tink abt that in APril... still to early ... CNY is coming... and i din get anything new clothes fer myself fer CNY 2006..huh??? 1st time lor..nvm..i can save more money to buy afew more bottles of perfumes.. furthermore..dear 21st bdae coming... also duno wad to buy leh..but i've 2 choices on mind now... shall see abt that in March..arggg...so much exp going ard...

Weiqi Wedding

2005-12-16T11:43:00.000+08:00

Group

Photos of iWOW's Beauties...haha

After the dinner...

2005-12-05T00:34:00.000+08:00

feeling abt funny? Touched or hapi ..i am not sure myself.... din expect my so-call dream cum true... in tis dream of mine... i alwaz dreamt that i am still in contact wif this primary sch best fren of mine..at tat time...we were really best fren.. best until we reali help each other out in wadeva shit we got into.... then one dae when we were in sec sch .... coz of some silly actions or wadeva... we stopped calling each other... stopped toking to each other and even to the extent of seeing each other eye to eye.... at 1st...i was rather angry at her..i hated her.... fer the word betrayal.... well...we both haf our own grp of frens in the end.... i managed to concentrate on my studies frm then on... and went to POly aft that...but she gt married wif a son... after 8 yrs of hatred... one dae i saw her profiles in friendster.... i am hapi to see her well & hapi... i feel reali hapi fer her........ i viewed her profiles a couple of times.... to understand how's life fer her now... but guess...she found out and then she added me in her list of frens in friendster and tagged wif a msg... asking me of how haf i been.... i replied her... though hapi in my heart but nthg much to really sae to her... bcz of wad?? too long nv contact or wad? paisei?? well.... i wanted to add her long time ago..bt din haf the courage to do so.... coz i am nt sure if she still hates me just lk how i hated her in the past? i reali admire her coz by adding me in her friendster and me accepting her offer means that we haf already forgotten wads in the past and ready to accept each other once again.... may God bless her!

2005-11-29T00:35:00.000+08:00

alrite.... in another few more hrs time...my dearest colleague will be getting married soon...haiz... it will be another start of a new chapter of her live bahz.....

enuff abt that...yesterdae ...dear brought me to Orchard cz we wanted to tk sm pics fer the lightings at Orchard..then leh...i realise i forgotten to charge the battery ...haha...bt then we still manage to tk 2 pics lar.... haha... then i also forgot to do 1 ting yesterdae lor...i forgot to go Marks & Spencer to buy my fav strawberry cookie lar....sobbzzzz......looking ferward to go Orchard again.... this time i must rem to buy....hmpf!!

2005-11-26T22:45:00.000+08:00

This is the !st Saturdae that I'm spending @ home and almost slping lk 3/4 of the dae...haiz... coz dear nids to be on duty tt's y i am @ hm now..if nt...i'll be Orchard balonglong liaoz...

Yawnz...juz woke up ..have uploaded some pics of yesterdae earlier on.... sm of the pics i've taken at the Book Prize ceremony & at Mimi's 21st bdae...erm...took 1/2 dae leave to attend a stupid award ceremony & even made me waited fer so damm long lor....kaoz...

so nua now..... wanted to go Orchard wif my bro at 7.30pm jz now bt then ...i too lazy to step out of the hse.... haiz....but also a gd ting la...coz i can save $$ over this wkend mahz..hehe..haven spent a single cent yet... but my collleague's wedding nearing..means gt to spend $$ again....

i miss dear.... nitez

After Mimi's Bdae

2005-11-26T18:54:00.000+08:00

Too Bo liao le...after waiting fer an hr...

Do we Look alike??

the Stupid Brother of mine taken just b4 the Book Prize Ceremony Starts...phew...lucky he was there to accompany me..if nt...i'll be bored to death...

the Darlie Smile.....hahahaha

@ my New Hse.....

My Favourite Purple Shoe - Dear bought fer me one...See....

Look @ Dear...hahaha

2005-11-22T23:52:00.000+08:00

My Monkey slping on my bed..... Dear bought me!

2005-11-20T13:44:00.000+08:00

whahaha...feeling so sian..coz i tink i kinda of being overloaded wif my p/t...

Phew... just knock off frm wrk though it's a Sunday...well...tml and the dae aft tml and another dae aft tml also nid to slog .....

But the consolation is that i njoyed myself @ Kelly's bdae last nite..though it's her bdae, me & derek won lotsa of prizes lorz..majiam my bdae..whaahaahaha..so paisei worz..... okie...i going tk my lunch liaoz....will be posting our pics taken @ the party soon...

2005-11-18T22:05:00.000+08:00

haiz...so happy...cz Ah Cai has helped me to set password fer this blog..which means not everyone will be able to see wad i will be writing here..unless they so powerful lorz.... and only Ah Cai noes my password..nt even my dear noe lor..muahahaha

then...i start to realise tt in fact i dun really understand tis fren of mine.... though i noe her fer abt 3yrs...however it is when i started wrkg wif her....seeing her frm mon-fri, 8.30 - 5.30 tt i realise tt she has a number of funny tots, actions etc....and learn more abt her...well...she can get rather uptight sometimes over small tings (in my opinion) ...hope she can learn hw to cope wif her own emotions soon..... wad fer get upset over pple lk them? dun spoil ur mood cz of tis... heck them ar...tt's wad i alwaz sae now...HECK

2005-11-14T23:59:00.000+08:00

This sweet lady here...is my Mgr..she really takes care of me... she is in fact a beri Intelligent ger and taught me alot.... simply love her wrking style....

Oops...btw..she was once my interviewer..and i tok alot of cork wif her during the interview...haha..

Me wrking so hard...concentrating so hard until i dun even noe whu is the culprit snapping my side view....ekkss...so fat!

Ms NCL & Mrs Porky at the Porky's Cubicle....haha, cant see my messy table... well.... though i noe this ger fer some time but actually i still dun really understand her that's y we bicker most of the time.... but overall...i must sae she's been good to me lar....though we have had much arguements..hope that u will nt take those to heart....

My Colleague - Sin Yee sitting in the same room as me...haha...she caught me snapping shots of her.... she is Sooooooo SKINNY worz....

2005-11-14T23:17:00.000+08:00

Pull Your Ears......Hmpffff

Happy Together!!!

PICTURE of Mr & Mrs Porky!!!

2005-11-14T23:14:00.000+08:00

2005-11-14T23:02:00.000+08:00

haha....so happy this Week...coz i finally bought a DIGICAM.... which i've been crazy fer so long..finally gt it...haha..so let me try posting some pics fer laughter.....

Life after 21

2005-11-10T00:39:00.000+08:00

Haiz....i am now feeling scared...coz i am alwaz looking back @ those times when i am still a small ger.... now so fast just turn 21 .... seems like i will get settled down in 5-6 yrs time...and then i will be entering into my 30s liaoz worz.... haiz...dun even dare tink of this ....

well...todae at office...damm bz lorz.... after tt still nid to go clinic wrk...haiz..life is so hectic..sometimes i really just feel lk going hm to slp, eat and roll on my comfy bed... and slack my time away......at times i also wish that i can have more spare time to mit up wif frenz..and 'la-kopi' ..but too bad...i am not born wif a golden spoon in my mouth..so i gt to wrk hard fer $$ lorz....yawnz...

todae aft clinic..dear cum fetch me...then we went somewhere quiet to sit down and chit chat lor..he told me alot of tings lar.... more than wad he usuali sae...haha...reali enjoy jz listening to you..though i was just tired and din feel lk opening my mouth to tok...but i enjoyed listening to u.....

2005-10-31T00:09:00.000+08:00

Oops...just realise it has been some time since the last time i updated my blog worz.... in fact i dun even noe wad am i bz wif.... Emilia called my last week and even mention some of her downs in life and i dun even haf time to tok to her and mit her fer some catch ups...feel so bad ....

then on fridae...met up wif Angelia fer dinner then both of us feel that we din made gd use of time..coz we din manage to buy anthing that evening...then she console me that at least we din spend too much .... haiz....

it will be another 2 more daes b4 my 21st bdae... bt then feel so funny..tis yr wld be 'special' bahz..coz will be celebrating wif my family & relatives... at a Karoke lounge....well..programme has been set... then i guess fer tis yr bdae...i wouldnt haf time to pei dear le.... dun mention abt u lar...i also would feel awkward..having to celebrate my bdae wif so many relatives... perhaps all these yrs... have already gotten used to celebrate wif u le bahz.... but then again... i wld also lk to share tis special dae wif my family... coz wifout them..there wouldnt be me lorz....so dear ...u got to bear wif it worz....

P.S : Hope i can get to enjoy myself on that dae....

12 October 2005

2005-10-12T16:07:00.000+08:00

Received ur mum's call @ 3.49pm..... she told me that your beloved GP passed away... telling me to inform you as she couldnt reach you... i was shocked, taken aback... din noe my nxt sentence to sae... bt juz told her I'll try contacting you and see how it goes....

Was reali confused wad to go..duno to call u or nt..... I din dare pick up the fone and dial ur no. coz i duno wads ur reaction... i noe u are sad this few weeks liaoz... and each tym we visited ur GP in the hospital.... ur facial expression tells me that u cant bear to see ur GP lying on the bed wifout any reactions when u tok to him....

Dear..dun be sad....ur GP luvs you ...... he will be very glad that you've spent his last daes wif him.... though he is most of the time unconciuos...but he noes.... God Bless

2005-10-05T00:34:00.000+08:00

tot alot.... one of my colleague is getting married nxt mth... was tinking when will it be my turn..ehehe....guess this shouldnt be in my tots at tis pt..at tis moment...at tis age.... coz i noe in my hart...i've found my soul mate.... found the 'husband-to-be' in reality but he's not my 'dream kind of guy lar' ... however... u really brighten up my dae .... wadever shit i've haf had at wrk & life ...u are alwaz dere..hehe...

..... Ermmm..... perhaps we've met too early and too fast.... if we've met only now... perhaps tings might be better..... just hope tt we can kip the flame burning till the dae we lay down in the ground....

wad u've told me just nw over the fone...i totally agree wif u.... friends are nt going to be fer u all the time but family and closed ones does.... glad u've felt tis wae.... but then i stil prefer the talkative u.....hehehe

2005-10-02T21:55:00.000+08:00

Then it's October again!! went to clinic tis early morn... then realise is not my slot... so called Dear back ...coz he sent me 2 wrk tis morn.... ya..so angry...he din slp the whole nite and went to Loyang 'tua pey gong' 4am in the morn...omg ...siao kia......... but anywae he called me up at 8am while he was waiting patiently downstairs..glee...so happy to see him ....

we spent the entire dae together.... went MOs to haf lunch.... and walk ard in compasspt... b4 going to his aunt's hse.. was supposed to get some hairdo wif ah chai... but ended up resting @ his hse coz wasnt feeling well in the aft... but duno y the pain go away itself wifout any medn.... so decided to walk ard lorz...haiz... if tml dun nid to wrk and he dun nid go back camp then it'll perfect le... cant wait fer tml evening to cum then can see him again..haha

My Reply from Reading Your Blog

2005-09-29T00:29:00.000+08:00

I read ur blog as stated in the SMS... I've alot to sae to you... but duno which to sae 1st... I've gt explainations to you...bt din noe how to sae out...

!stly, i wasnt @ all angry @ u when i went ard lookg fer the PR... coz i noe you are busy.. furthermore Rina is the one whu tells me to "ask chailing to help find"... but i din..coz the fact tt u are BUSY!! So to simplify tings... i went to do it myself (PS : Not being Calculative Here) and i din EXPECT to get FUCKed by 2 persons... one of which is YOU which makes the whole thing even worse..coz u are considered one of my close fren..... i was mad @ Rena coz she showed me atittude when i sae i dun haf the PR fer ELAN Digital... and her reply was" TSK .... Chailing noes...she noe one.....go ask her..." so i went ask u the 2nd tym but u told me u forgotten... then i no choice liaoz lorz.... i went approach Rena again.. but this tym worse still... nt only her F** atittude but also she found the PR I am looking fer...

then wad? Y am I mad @ u then? Coz despite all above.... u raise ur VOIce @ me.... which makes me feel ...... duno hw 2 describe lorz... can sae it wasnt beri pleasant coz i din had lunch tt dae..only ate 2-3 pcs of chicken nuggets... even the rice WQ bought..i also throw away...only ate 2 mouthful of rice...

SO the main idea is I din expected u to turn out tis wae when i merely repeated to you that "can u nxt tym try nt 2 alwaz forget" the word is TRY... i noe both of us are BUSY... cant rem every single ting.... bt it's beri NORmal you noe... but then PLS... i am doing a KIND favour... I cant tell Rena that "oh... i ask Chailing but she saes she dun haf any idea seeing the PR ..rite?" then nvm.... Rena can put all the blame on me... blame me fer being such a BLUR A/Cs ASST... blame me fer making her find a stupid PR etc... bt at the end of the story... the one I am trying to help turns out to be mad @ me... isnt that sad to hear? Some more we can like have cold war despite the fact that we noe each other rather well....

Was surprised at how cum STan & Sebas came to noe abt tis... din noe wad exactly dey said but then I surely wasnt unhappy that dae when i was looking fer the PR ...its wad u shouted tt dae that matters... when i am just telling u nicely try nt to forget...try....nt must.. dun nid to get so uptight and raise ur voice when i repeated twice.... i dun see a nid to....

then u were saying my atittude.... saying abt my straight forwardness.... erm...i duno wad to sae ...coz most of the times maybe i sound sarcastic in my tone but actually i was just blabbering wad i am tinking @tt pt of time... at least i din sae something harsh tt morn like : can u stop being so forgettful? In fact .. i din tok to you fer these times coz i feel that u duno wads the ACtual reason fer me being so MAD and Upset.... wad i am angry @ is 2 diff pple & issues.....between rena & you........nt bcoz i gt to do ur job or wad... its coz .... dun wan to explain le.. it's all in the abv... dun wan to kip repeating myself....

Hey.. wad chose between pride & frenship? lay down ur pride fer frenship is ur choice.. cum on... it's not a problem tt serious yet.. it's just tt we are looking @ diff tings... u haf misunderstood the reason y i was unhapppy... and i din understand ur situation perhaps... but then 1 ting is ... i din feel gd either

A Fucking Bad Morning

2005-09-27T12:32:00.000+08:00

Well...i do haf alot of grumbles now.... coz of this fren whu wrks in the same co as me.... some times i really wanted to shout @ her telling her to WAKE UP her ideas...coz i personally feels that she takes ALL her frens fer Granted!! I've had enuff shoutings from her in the office.... speak so loud that i tink the Mechanical side pple can all hear her lorz... shouting @ me... for goodness sake... get it clear lorz... i am doing her a favour.... cant she be more appreciative.... too bad..she nv was.... here i am stuck wif tonnes of Travel & other petty cash Claims for the co staff.... gt to do invoicing.... then she tot she is the ONLY one whu tot she is farking Busy...

Alrite... she told me she is kinda of busy this morn..... and her problem wif Sebas... okie... so i went ard going after a piece of PO which has a missing PR.... which she is supposed to ensure to haf attached wif the original PO when she does her filing.... and then while i was searching HIGH & LOW, UP & DOWN fer tt piece of SHIT... i gt farked by the Project Director... coz she sae "confirm haf one.... if i found it, then you gt to gif me a treat" and it may nt sound offensive but look at her expression...obviously she is DAMM Farking pissed off by me... however, she does not understand the fact that tis isnt my job ---- to look HIGH & LOW, UP & DOWN fer a PR....it's my dear fren job.. bt she is busy and she told me she has no idea of this PR.... so in order to make tings simpler fer her, i went ard like a mad woman and in the end not only kena Farked by the PRoject Director but also shouted by my DEar Fren... so this is the just roughly wad went wrong tis morn...

A msg fer her... but perhaps she wun haf the TIME to read..since she is Farking BUsy wif her wrk...:

Mmmm...i may not be a good-tempered person and perhaps sometimes u may tink tat i am venting my frustrations on you... well... tat could be the case SOMetimes... but for goodness sake....i farking hate you when u just blew ur top at me infront of them... i am doing u a kind favour .. hence i dun tink i should deserve any of ur NONSense... and fer the sake of the Almighty... dun alwaz assume and jump to conclusions... tink harder sometimes.... tink of others and their feelings .... I really haf the urge again to tell straight into ur face when i am standing at ur desk, i really wanted to explain to you why am i so PIssed Off... but i noe if i am ever going to do that... it'll be even more worse..coz all the FFF words will kip cuming out frm my mouth....

It wasnt u that i am angry wif at 1st...i am angry wif the Project Director.... but it was when u shouted at me that you sae you dun haf mega memory to remember all the things u've done...... that lighted the flame ...okiez... pls... i also haf alot of things to do... true ... i also cant rem so much things...bt sometimes we cant afford to forget certain things one... and even if u really had forgotten ..it's also nt ur fault.... bt then you shouldnt vent ur anger or frustrations by shouting it all out onto me.... and then again afterall, i've said my piece.

Dun worry ... i wun remember this kind of small arguements ....

2005-09-25T02:23:00.000+08:00

went to ECP wif ah Teck to haf a break from his hse..coz the both of us felt that the hse was too noisy fer us to spend the evening together..hehehe.....

then Karl (Derek's army fren) wanted to eat that that stupid ECP food village again lar... food so exp and nt nice one.... then we bo bian lor... follow him lar... afterwhich his ger fren suggested to go OCH but then we declined his 'kind' offer.... well, we would rather spend the nite slping soundfully @ hm, hiding under our blankets than to be so bo liaoz lorz.... but lucky we din left early when we were @ Seletar Dam.... coz the whole of hg & sk was raining cats & dogs... if we were to leave early then we wld 'kena' the storm liaoz lor....

haiz... gt to blog another time liaoz.... coz i nid to wake up early to go wrk @ the clinic again... and @ the same tym...i really nid to sit down and tink properly of hw to maximise my tym 2 earn more....haiz... $$ is alwaz nt enuff .....

2005-09-20T18:46:00.000+08:00

living happily after??? ahahahaa.. dear's been posted to unit liaoz.... and he's an AMO Asst which means he is in the Support & Services side which also means he can cum back everydae home... yupz.... except going to wrk every morn, he cums to fetch me every evening after wrk... hahaha..so happy to see him.... even when he is still serving his NS. Just hope everydae would be tis happie..... going out fer dinner now....

2005-09-17T20:40:00.000+08:00

went to catch the new release of the movie @ P.S GV. The GRimm Brothers.. it was nice but some of the scenes were rather gross... was walking ard P.S and din expect to see sm pple der.. the same old gang of pple sticking ard ...

hehe.... took some pics wif Dear @ Action City... it was fantastic... coz we were so busy changing our poses and loooking into diff cameras....1 at the top & another below.. but anywae we had alot of fun posing....

2005-09-13T23:06:00.000+08:00

that was a song by Chicago and the Song title is "You Are My Inspiration"

Dear... you are the motivation that pushes me to wrk everydae...to wrk and wrk.. and not to tink so much.... yupz... another 2 of my colleagues getting married this yearend... hahahahah... sometimes i really hope that i can live happily ever after after marriage... dun haf to wrk and slog etc... just nid to stay @ home... learn cooking & baking... one of my favourite activity b4 i knew you 51/2 years back... and then go shopping wif frens or play mahjong when i've gotten tired of shopping.... but i noe ... that's a fantasy larz... quite hard ar..looking @ the situation now...hehehe.. bt nvm... as long as we are together happily...anyting is fine wif me....

i muz admit u've learnt to be more mature le... was quite taken aback by wad u've said... but let me tell u... only true frens stay behind whenever u are in trouble... but alot of times and sad to sae.... some frens may just as well be a passing stage of our lives.... and our lifetime... we may perhaps lose some and gain some frens.... so better cherish wad we've got now ....heheehz...nitez

Chicago - You Are My Inspiration

2005-09-13T22:48:00.000+08:00

You know our love was meant to be
The kind of love to last forever
And I want you here with me
From tonight until the end of time
You should know
Everywhere I go
Always on my mind
In my heart
In my soul

Baby, you're the meaning in my life
You're the inspiration
You bring feeling to my life

You're the inspiration
Wanna have you near me
Wanna have you hear me saying"No one needs you more than I need you"

And I know
Yes I know that it's plain to see
So in love when we're together
Now I know

That I need you here with me
From tonight until the end of time
You should know
Everywhere I goYou're always on my mind

2005-09-11T00:06:00.000+08:00

haiz... feel so guilty coz went ktv wif Dear, Mimi & Kelly but on our wae home Dear is sick...sobzzz.... hope he gets well again by tml.... really dun wan anything to happen to him ....

dear.. i haven thank you fer the MP3 .. perhaps todae rush down to mit them somemore brave thru the storm wif my lower body all wet..hahaha... then no tym to really thank you.... i really like the MP3... u sae u nid to get 'somthing' impt frm ur fren @ white sands... i tot wad was so impt.... haiz... din noe it was the MP3 u wanted to gif me.... i feel so bad.... sorrie....

dear, really njoy singing wif u jz now though there was some commotion when my ring juz flew out my finger...hehehehe...paisei ar..... kkk.... shall see u tml morn... muaaaaaaaks.....luv ya lots!!

2005-09-07T01:18:00.000+08:00

alrite... todae weds liaoz... mid wk lez...hahahaah..finally...kekeek..cant stop feeling gleeful abt it...

but anywae... this entry is to thank those frens whu gave me precious opinions and esp when i was on the verge of gifing up ... well... at least i noe that it is no use lamenting and wad ought to be done.... wah liaoz.. adrianne ar... i nt as brave as you lar... omg... u called directly to the other party and 'Trash' her out.... really admire ur 'jing shen' worz.... hahahahahaha... but 1 ting i muz admit... my colleagues really play a major role in diverting my moodiness ..... esp my SHK kakis... u noe whu u are horz... dun nid i spell ur names out huhz....

... wondering when can i start on my shopping spree again arhz..... haiz..wrk and wrk... whole dae long.. sibei sian.... this weekend got to headache to hunt fer places to go le... but kelly & mimi sae wan to cheong 'K'.... so duno if it'll be successful coz i'm wrking in the dae and not too sure wad tym dear is booking out frm Tekong.... looking forward to mth end again....

finally i pray tt Mr Porky will recover faster.....

2005-09-04T23:01:00.000+08:00

well...sundae has past.. and tml back to office again... haiz... wad more to sae... every week also like tis... but tis weekend is more fulfilling for me...coz Dear brought me to eat Kushin-Bo @ Suntec... okie lorz... the food there is interesting... coz got alot of fresh seafood.... eg the prawns, salmon, tuna.... but one ting i dun like is the idea of queuing up fer limited special dish ie 'mayo lobster' haiz yo....

and then sorrie dear... fer getting u infected wif my long-tym flu... really nid to get jab one of these daes when i recovered completely ehz.... i am really sick fer almost 3/4 mth liaoz... still not recovering fast....

then that nite when u brought me to ECP and told me of some of ur worries.... i showed no response... coz i din noe how to put tings across to u....u asked me why i hate her so much??? hate is too heavy a word to use....i dun mind if she juz call you once in a blue moon... but which gf can tolerate a ger calling up her bf at least twice a week to tok abt her problems and the things that happen to her??? which gf??? on the other hand, it's no pt saying that you wan to stop contacting her... coz the problem is she is the one contacting u instead... then wad i chose to do is to simply ignore this whole damm idea of her.... i am really so tired of her calling u every now and then... wad does she wan?? just tell her to sae out straight lar..... dun nid to call and complain to u her every complaints..... omg.... i really feel like applying super glue onto her lips so that she can kip her fat mouth shut lorz... haiz..i dun wan myself to get affected by her lar.. whu is she to cum into our lives and tries to affect me.... fuck off... i am not going to let my emotions to get swayed easily by her..

2005-09-03T01:08:00.000+08:00

just came back after miting my long-tym fren---EMilia... she is the sweetest ger in this entire wrld ... so glad tt we're still in contact... i've alwaz admire her fer her great dress sense...her 'matureness', her everything... she is definately a great fren to haf and i'll alwaz feel relieved after chatting wif u gers .... perhaps you wouldnt haf the chance to noe wad i've actually feel abt u and kelly but infact... the 2 of u ....no matter hw busy we are kept busy at wrk... we'll still haf the 'xiao nu ren' spirit hor... hahaha... wonder nxt fri/sat ....able to mit u all mahz... really nid tym to catch up wif u guys.....

Stepping into September

2005-09-01T23:45:00.000+08:00

Time really flies ... entering into September which also means tt i've left sch fer nearly 1/2 yr... kinda of miss schooling and those daes where we would stay in the sch's library to study..tok etc.. and in another 1/2 yr... Mr & Mrs Porky would be entering into their 6th yr of relationship. during these yrs...u've alwaz been the caring one, alwaz trying to be there fer me .....i really feel loved by you....i am already grateful tt we've come this far... as fer the future... i cant foresee and dun even dare hold on too much hopes...

2005-08-29T23:34:00.000+08:00

29th August 2005

it's already been almost 3 months since i've started working.... guess i am quite late when i started this job @ iWOW... coz a number of my frens has already started their wrking life since Apr/May. infact fer the 2 whole months tat i'm jobless.... it's really form a part of an unforgetable memory in my life... everydae when i open my eyes.. all i wanted was to see you... i dun mind following you to wrk...riding ard..doing despatch under the hot sun... at that time... i really enjoy wad i am doing wif you.. though it was really hard wrk...we alwaz do tings together...i'll alwaz haf tat in mind.... i really feel bad, shouldnt haf made u worry and u ended up with a twisted ankle.... haiz... at tis moment, i really miss you.... i cant describe this kind of feeling

as fer Dear... how's ur leg? Must haf hurt alot that dae... sorry..... hope that ur condition will improve coz we will be going out this weekend again, somemore i not wrking on Sundae.. really want to spend all my time wif u. have read some of my frens blog.. some happy, some sad entries... but afterall, i feel so lucky to haf u by my side all yrs.. cant wait to see u @ white sands tis sat... and14th Sept and BMT finally over... (so does it mean that our toughest time will be over?)

2005-08-28T23:31:00.000+08:00

duno why i am feeling so blue again.... shouldnt haf felt this wae.. coz i spent my entire weekends wif him... somemore i dun haf to wrk Sunday morn...

was really mad at u in the bus to PRS ...coz tot of standing wif u all the wae there.. so that i can have more time wif u... even fer 5 more mins... then tot u safely rpt to ur sgt when we got there... and i din expect that person to be u... it all came as a complete shock.. din expect to see u injured... coz i tot that was all... after sending you there... just hope u are alright now... shouldnt haf gotten so angry wif u... maybe u wouldnt have sprained ur leg or got injured .... sobzzz

2005-08-17T22:32:00.000+08:00

alrite... 1 more dae to pass b4 derek's coming home - this fridae...he saes he's cuming to fetch me but then i still haven gt any ideas wad to wear... of course fer him to see larz.... then?

i really hope the daes can pass faster lorz.... so that i can get my pay again.... but another ting is my pimples Attack..omg.... really beri bad lehz... every mth like this... but this is the worse... relly dun dare to go out.... esp orchard...haiz*3

then these few daes i beri happy lorz.. coz morn can slp like no body biz cz dad sending me to wrk... if only he can fetch me frm wrk... that would be perfect liaoz.... hahaha..some more i dun haf to squeeze onto the bus wif others... cross the overhead bridge which i hate to do early in the morn....

okie... got to eat supper again liaoz... dear...i miss u!! Muaaks

Life is Not a Bed of Roses Either

2005-08-16T22:35:00.000+08:00

you may think I dun understand how you feels... tat's nt true... coz i felt the wae u do a few mths back ... and i try not to tink of the bad side. however the diff is that i am taking over an accounts job while your position is newly created to support the sales dept.....

alot of things which you may not yet realise depend alot on your decisions * ie you choose whether you wan to be happy fer the dae or not. Things take time to happen, esp when it cums to mastering skills... and it's not like you snap ur fingers and everything cums ur wae... perhaps you dun realise this fact...

sometimes... when you feel bad or useless or... u may tink you are going to take forever to happen.... dun be. Since you dun wish to be disturbed during this period of tym... then i shall voice my opinions here... hope u are not offended...in anywae

just wan to let you noe the fact that you are beri lucky coz you have quite a handful of frens whu are really concern abt you... wad abt me?? I am not trying scolding or lecturing you but just wans u to noe wad i feel or tink.... sometimes i just feel that one should be contented enuf and not ask fer more.... and in life and esp the wrkg wrld... alot of things are beyond our control and they are beri practical.... Then when ur boss ask u to do this... u cant sae "orhh....i dun used to do this and i hate doing all these stuff by myself..." cannot mahz...wrk is wrk.... not like in sch... when i dun lk to do dreamweaver... then i can just let my team mates handle the load.... life is more practical one... take tings easy then perhaps you will lead a more happy life

I noe no matter how much i sae or write ... its of no use ..coz in the 1st place we tink differently but just FYI, the tings u are learning now will cum in handy esp when cust ask you abt our products compared to others ... secondly, by learning others products, you'll find it easy to master our own... Cheer up..hahahaha

2005-08-14T02:50:00.000+08:00

haiz yoz... finally you are back todae huhz...hahahha... so happy to see you but i really dun hope for Sundae to cum so fast... then tis wk u bk in so early arh...XIANZ liao lorz....

better cherish my time wif u now...hehehe...will update again tml - Sundae

The Day I Missssss You So Much

2005-08-12T01:49:00.000+08:00

Hey Boy, cuming back on Sat rite ... hahhaha.. so EXCITED to see you again.... well... i feel so bad before, during and after the show (The Island). I knew you will be beri worried fer me.... was glad you are able to call me just now in the middle of the show... nearly doze off ...yawnz....haiz... i din want to go initially... but they kip asking me to join them coz got free tickets to the show and todae is the last dae.... hmpf.... then i was so goddamm busy the entire dae that i got to stay back & try to finish my stuff ...so i left at 8.45pm lorz... some more the last to leave...nid to switch off lights etc..so scary!!

but then whenever i feel scared or discouraged, i tink of Dear... you gave me strength to face challenges ahead and my fears... wadever and whenever things i do, you are alwaz on my mind..... hahahaz....funny ar.... infact i am still learning to be more independent.... but the worse is the Sundae Effect when we got to part at PRS..sobz sobz....

You alwaz sae i am alwaz late when going to fetch you.... yupz.. i admit that... but then there are some reasons behind it... some coz of unforseen circumstances..... but i promise ...i will be on time this sat to fetch you alrite.....oh ya... i short of $$ these few daes.... so i use ur card to draw $$ juz now to take the cab home juz now..... haahahaha..... As for ur Mum that side... we will try our wae out to help her... alrite??

Well.. there's yet another thing on my mind which has been bothering me since last nite. I just wan to let you noe that :

Sometimes... we may not know wad we actually wanted that's why we tend to regret some of our decisions... but we cant be alwaz making the right decisions all the time... perhaps we should try to learn how to accept the fact and maybe in this wae, we might feel a little more happier.

But then i also noe that we share different viewpoints but I hope that none of us is affected emotionally or mentally coz i dun wan to lose a fren at the end of a dae bcoz of some minor issues and to me, only true frens see the true color of me. Yupz, I agree with you that we nid to wear different mask at different situation or environment but to you, I may seem scheming coz i dun let things take its natural course instead at times i try to make it happen.. but things are sometimes not the wae u see it. Its like todae i help you...but whu noes when i will nid ur help.... for me, i help her when it is still within my scope (though its not my job to do that) coz i din wan to make things look so ugly. Perhaps there are some miscommunications between you and 'her'.... maybe i shouldnt be the one telling you abt how and wad 'she' said... coz i tot you wouldnt take it to heart..bcoz i am the one whu tells you... i tink i was wrong... i din understand you well enuf until i've read ur blog.... Well, i am really sorry.

At the end of everything, i just wan to let you noe that i am really concern abt you and was really shocked by ur post .. i duno whether isit too overly concern or wad... but i noe i see you so 'xin ku' i also feel 'xin ku' fer you. i dun wan to be the person whu cause u all these hurt. I noe i cant change wad you feel but pls do not ignore me horz.... i feel so bad lehz todae in the morn...

2005-08-10T23:21:00.000+08:00

Haiz... another busy dae @ wrk but somehow it is a more of a slow motion one while @ wrk... coz i was tinking.."aiya..so many tings to do liaoz.. do slowly lor..so rush fer wad.." so i intend to do S.L.O.W.L.Y Muahahahaahaha....

Okie... now i wan to declare something that i really regretted not doing... still got wad? the mondae 12mn Firworks at Marina Bay larz.... coz Mrs Porky was tired and was tinking abt the traffic situation there... so intended to drop the idea of going and ended up sleeping b4 midnite that dae... sobz... now i realise it wouldnt be a wasted trip coz i read Angelia's Blog and saw all those pics.... WOWWWwwwww.....phew weeeee... it's so nice ehz....

then the 3rd thing is that i hope that God can hear my prayers.... "i hope Ah Cai will get to enjoy her job more as time passess".... and "weekends can alwaz cum faster than weekdaes....so that Mrs & Mr Porky can see each other more".....

Back to Reality Again... wah liaoz.. so SIANZZzz

2005-08-10T00:17:00.000+08:00

alrite... should return to reality by tml liaoz.. after 4 days of 'holidaes' le.. so i tink study life is in fact better 1000x...haiz...

that dae at GV P.S, i was in fact so mad at you at 1st but her call to you made my anger worsen... i din mean to vent all of those on you and run out of Carrefore... but some times i tink you dun haf this responsiblity to hang on to the fone though there wasnt much to tok abt.... and then bcoz of this we missed the 1st part of the show.. see see...it's all becoz of her again... ARggggGGG.. whu does she tink she is.... and sorry i din noe you went ard looking fer me... i feel so hurt that your leg is hurting you when u walked ard looking fer me... and it was so dramatic when u were at the 6th floor carpark while i was actually standing at the 5th floor carpark waiting fer u to call me... sorry.. coz at times i feel that you cared fer her feelings more than mine...and i was wrong... Yupz.. everytime i tell myself not to tink so much and trust more in u but each time... her calls are making me so ....... okie.. i will try again not to tink so much ... i will learn how to trust more in our relationship

these 4 daes wif Dear is so enjoyable... but times passes by so fast..sobzzz... tried so hard to convince myself to go back to wrk and start to get busy again.. but then again... i feel sooo sianz to do so... perhaps without you by my side, i really feel so restless to do things.. and lost at times....i juz hope that you would be by my side in wadever i do... how i wish that you are able to fetch me back & from wrk... haiz.. i really live in our world le... sometimes i really wish that the world revolves just ard us... and we dun haf to wrk to earn money to support ourselves... u dun haf to serve 2 yrs NS....just when will i grow up and stop thinking of all those and be more realistic myselves.... 4 daes really not enuf ... and dear.. i am still waiting...................

TO Ah Cai... my Clinic and SHK KAki...

2005-08-06T00:17:00.000+08:00

Hey ger... listen up!!

1st: Dun be so stressed @ work... pple there are alrite one..
2nd: Take ur time 2 learn... dun nid KC to learn or try pick things up fast... (i also still learning)
3rd: I hope u will learn to like ur job.....
4th: Dun take pple's bad comments to heart.... listen then forget .... coz by rembering will only make ur life more miserable...
5th: Yes.. i admit everytime when they 'suan' you... i cant really understand how u feel or wad u felt.. but i can only encourage u to like wad u are doing so that you wun feel dread to go wrk every morning... and may eventually quit the job.. (which i dun hope to see)
6th: Rina has also asked me how u felt abt the job... she hope u finds it okie fer u... and some more she told me she can tell u dun like table bound job..... hahahaaha ...and she can tell that u are falling aslp .... in front of the com... (y lehz.. play those games until sianz liao huh???)
7th: Dun worry larz.... more will cum to you sooner..... and then u will be like me... go home at 7/8pm....I love wad i am doing now... so i dun mind to wrk extra UNPAID OT...hahahah..get wad i mean here??

TO DEAR...A.K.A Mr. Porky

2005-08-06T00:08:00.000+08:00

Dear... i duno whether will u be reading on tis... but i just wan to sae something here..

I know you have all sorts of tedious trainings in camp and I alwaz hear you misses me... (but then i am not u, i duno how exactly u miss me) and u got to worry fer me despite during trainings... and most of the times got screwed by ur bastard sergents (hahaha) ...erm... i am sorry fer making you worried all the times... haiz... hear that Shaoliang story until i nearly ZZzzzz... lucky u call my hp so that i have excuse to go off.... haha.. well, he sounded scary initally and some more he is those beri impulsive those kind of 'siao kia' i scared he do silly tings mahz... but anywae... i dun wan to ans his calls nxt time liao.. coz he beri boring one.. everytime is the same story...knorrrzzzzzzz.....yawnz..zz...

wah liao i wanted to go home and watch the vcds one lor... and rest and eat chips ...relaz and enjoy ... then dun nid liao lar.z... in the end i also nv mit up wif kel and mimi.. coz mimi sae by the time she reach hg is already 12mn...so i sae we mit other daes lorz.. i also beri tired .... finally can see u tml and njoy our long weekends together ..hahahaha...shuang ehz

2005-08-05T10:40:00.000+08:00

wah liew.... finally is Fridae todae le....haha... then todae dress up abit larz... coz they going to take our fotos fer the company newsletter to be published... haizyo.. so paisei loz... hahaha

then tml dear cuming out le... that's great!! erm.. then now i am sitting at Ah Cai's place lar... coz nobody ans the fone.. and some more she got to learn some product knowledge loz.. finally she got more things to learn and exposed to le.. if not she sae she going to fall aslp liaoz.... haiyoz.. she is like tis one lar.. later busy.. sae wah liao... so busy etc.. then nothg to do ... she will sae so bored.. going to ZZZzzzzz....haha

then dear sae wan to go the J.K 'tian tian..' wif his bunk mates...i will Zzzzzz coz they alwaz tok abt their activities inside the camp one.. but some is beri interesting one lorz... and beri 'gao xiao' wahahahahahaah..... erm... hope to see him soon.. yupz.. i misses him so much.. yeyeyeye.. this week got long weekend lohz.. muahahahha

2005-08-03T23:46:00.000+08:00

Finally todae Wednesday... then can see my dear mahz... haiyoz dear... u must control urself worz... u inside majiam like chalet lorz.. eat western food.. ba kut tea.. red bean ice-cream etc.. i will tell ur mother...

Dear... i miss you... i am waiting fer this long weekend to see u. Make sure u lose some weight horz... erm...when free to upload our pics into this? okie... going to chat wif Angelia le... she beri happening ehz... wah liaoz....

2005-08-01T22:36:00.000+08:00

10.20pm... the time that you said she called you up., 10 mins be ur lights out.. and you told me you couldnt hang up her call... coz she was blarring away the moment you pick up the call... pls lorz... i dun buy that!!!

Why muz i be listening to ur many stupid excuses... it's really fucking stupid lorz.. whahaha... Bitch.. i hate you!! Fuck off our lives and stop wearing that stupid mask of yourz.... it really looks ugly... look like a piece of SHIT ...have you any ideas on tat. OMG.. well.. maybe nobody has ever dared to tell you tis.... and i am telling you tis. FUCK OFF

1st dae of the Month -AUGUST

2005-08-01T21:35:00.000+08:00

hahaha... todae is the 1st dae of August... gotten my pay but then already been drawing alot le... bought a lot of cha-pa-lang..

todae's also Ah Cai's 1st dae wrk at iWOW.... yes.. i know how you feel lar ... i can also see the look on ur eyes... 'lost'.... is like this one lor.... 1st dae... me also mahz... i worse lor... slp in the toilet... haha.. dae by dae... you'll get used and then you'll start to get more and more busy.. that's alot fer you to learn... alright... so dun feel so blue (though i noe you still sianz lar)
Erm.. hope you'll learn to enjoy wrkg there wif us....ahahhaa

Then to dear... i miss you damm lots lorz... kip looking at ur photos and whenever i look at the photos at my desk in the office.. i would alwaz feel more 'an wei' and look more forward to see you on Sat... i noe you haf more tings to occupy than I do.. coz you are alwz on my mind even when i am at wrk okiez... damm u....

then wad? this sat are we still going to 'tian tian huo guo' .... but we are going to catch 'Wonka' i hope.... haha... i nid to take more pics wif you.... so that i can see you more.... haiz.. sometimes i hope fer this weekend to arrive faster but cum to tink of it... i wouldnt wan.. coz it's hardly been a chance fer you to haf 4 daes off....in a row, i mean!

k...dear... i Love you and whenever i start to tink of you... i will go to my blog to listen to this ... BON JOVI - ALWAZ

2005-07-31T23:08:00.000+08:00

Happy moments alwaz pass so fast and once again it's Sunday evening again and it'll be another of my sleepless nites....

This song that you are hearing now is uploaded by my Dear... ya ... i know wad meant when you decided to upload this song. Yupz... is meaningful and i get wad you meant. Just alwaz rem to take care of yourself alright... and I really did enjoy myself that dae we went to catch STEALTH and sitting in Karl's car to round ard Seletar Dam. Hahahaha....

But then again.. when I tink of tml is MOnday... i am so sian liaoz.... faster cum home... i 'll be waiting fer you... maybe i go fetch you then we go eat "Tian Tian Seafood" Muakkkksss

Life as Full Time NYP Student

2005-07-30T01:52:00.001+08:00

Well.. to begin wif.. let me intro 1st.. this ger is can sae my poly 'hao jie mei' . We've been sticking together since Year 1.. but not forgetting Maria.. also in our click of 3.. however... we've been separated after 1 year of being in the same class...

i tot we may not be as close as b4 after we've been posted to diff class but it was a wrong perception coz after 3 years in NYP.. we've grown closer.. esp when we are 'pia-ing' fer our papers during the 1 week of study week.. haha...i will alwaz rem those daes when we are at Compass Point - BK or Rivervale Mall - BK (our fengshui place)...haha..

then we will alwaz like to take photos of ourselves despite during lecture times then YL will alwaz be the one left to go back to the LT alone to attend teh LT.. then the 3 of use will click here and there trying to catch the most natural part of us in the campus during our life as a student... if not we will go town to 'balonglong' then snap some shots of us.

2005-07-30T00:55:00.000+08:00

Pictures are taken using Ah Cai's Samsung Hp.. effect quite good lehz...hahaha

These 2 photos taken after our dinner @ Cafe Cartel @ P.S lar... see those looks on both our faces...really look shack rite... after 1 whole dae of wearing office wear to walk ard in SIngapore..haha. But Ah Chai look more rosier than me.. coz of her new- found make up kit she bought at Cine...

This ger ar... i noe since Yr 2 from TEP lar... she is the one whu introduce me the p/t @ Central Clinic.... which we earn our XTRA bucks... $$$$$

Aiya..i beri tired le lar... i tell you more abt her another dae lar...Yawnz...

2005-07-29T00:35:00.000+08:00

Phew... was such a hectic week ... guess tml will be worse.. taken 1/2 day leave to attend a stupid graduation ceremony which i din want to go ( but my dad...)... so now i am feeling rather excited abt tml... haha.... 1st time both my parents going to sch wif me... coz they dun like to go to sch... even last time in Sec Sch- Parents Meeting Session...only my mum went and she dreads going to sch...haiz... cant imagine tml still nid to go stage....

2005-07-25T23:57:00.000+08:00

Dear ar... you really must take care of urself in the few days to come.... i Really hope that the seconds and minutes will go abit faster to bring me near you again... but wadever it is... it will be Saturdae b4 i can hear you again.

the moment i see you line up wif ur bunk mates on the field the other dae..... i feel so blue again.. feel so sad again ehz.. but you will alwaz tell me... "dun worry... very fast one" Well.... that's not true...time alwaz passes so slow. You sae it will be better when ur 3 mths BMT is over... okie.. i tink that's not the end yet.... perhaps when u are posted to the unit, you can book out everydae or maybe not... it's not up to us to decide yet.

then just now... i was like dun feel like putting down yet... coz i nid to wait till sat b4 can hear ur voice again lar... beri sad one lor.... u dun understand!

The other dae at the seaside .... was nice watching the planes land.... it was quite romantic lar..haha... watching each of them flying back frm a distance and then landed. I will be waiting this Saturdae to catch STEALTH wif you ..alright... i love you. Take care of urself

Diana Ross - If we hold on together

2005-07-24T21:41:00.000+08:00

** This song is an oldie. A very nice song by Diana Ross and holds alot of memories for me. Don't you find it meaningful?

Don't lose your way with each passing day,
You've come so far, don't throw it away.

Live believing, Dreams are for weaving
Wonders are waiting to start.

Live your story, faith, hope and glory,
Hold to the truth in your heart

If we hold on together,
I know our dreams will never die.
Dreams see us through to forever,
Where clouds roll by, for you and I

Souls in the wind must learn how to bend.
Seek out a star, hold on to the end.
Valleys, mountains,
There is a fountain, washes our tears.

Words are swaying, somebody's praying
Please let us come home to stay.
If we hold on together,
I know our dreams will never die.
Dreams see us through to forever,
Where clouds roll by, for you and I.

And we are out there in the dark,
In the dark, we'll feel the light,
Warm our hearts, everyword.

If we hold on together, I know our dreams will never die.
Dreams see us through forever,
As high as souls can fly,
the clouds roll by, for you and I.

22nd July 2005 Friday

2005-07-22T22:43:00.000+08:00

Alright... met up wif CHailing to haf dinner at Pastamania..and YUmmmyyyyy.... to eat my fav dish ------ Ham and Sausage Baked Rice... hahaha... haiz..then i some more eat 1/2 way got diarrhoea.... i still rush to the toilet lor..... haiyoz... so paisei... then leave Ah Chai to eat alone... then in the end the both of us cant finish our share... Aiyoz.. lucky ar.... coz in the 1st place we still wan to order Pizza.... heng ar.... pengz

haha... then we were supposed to shop fer bag lar... then in the end the both of us ended buying the same design of OP skirt... jus the color difff only.. she bought pink and i bought the white one...haha... i actually wanted to get both but kinda of waste $$.....

haiz... must stop myself from buying more shoes..... i just bought 3 pairs frm C & K recently..should stop le... coz my shoe rack is going to run out of space....

k lar...gtg... tml still nid to fetch Mr Porky back frm camp... hahaha....he promised to go shopping wif me...

21st July 2005

2005-07-22T01:06:00.000+08:00

Well..... fever's gone... everything's gone and tml is fridae again... but 1st of all ... must thank this 2 very sweet ger --- Angelia & Magdalene. OKie lar.... Angelia... i tink i shall see you at the Graduation Ceremony... see lar... in the end u also got to go for the graduation.kk... see you!

18th July 2005

2005-07-18T23:38:00.000+08:00

was terribly sick over the weekends.. tink this is the first time of my life sick so jialat. Dear was watching me and even brought in a pail of ice water to wipe me. OMG...the pain was excruciating. and now he is back in camp and i am all alone to take care of myself ..... haiz... just hope that fridae is here b4 i noe it ....

13th July 2005 - Wednesday

2005-07-14T00:12:00.000+08:00

Wow... everydae is a tiring dae... it's mid-week again!! HAHAHA...i realise that i only look forward to the weekends and no matter how wornout i am ... i wouldnt find it so. Wrk and Wrk.. slog and slog... fer $$ to burn off time etc.. and only this i wouldnt be so lonely afterall..i guess.... at the same time $$ comes rolling while waiting... hahaha

Just received an SMS from Ah Chai that she is selected by my company. Her designation will be Sales Administrator.. i tink basically she will be playing role of the company's sales dept support team bahz... hope she will enjoy working wif me and the rest of the iWOW gang there. Haha.. Since i entered iWOW on 6th June... a number has left.. i remember this guy who is a IA sudent and he sings like JAcky Cheung.. he will also be leaving soon.... hahaha.. and Allan ...our Engineer, the one who used to sit in front of me... he has just left last fridae... kinda of miss his nagging ... haha ... duno larz..... we used to eat in really big grps and each time we go and cum back frm lunch.. there is alwaz a nid fer 2 big round tables and 2 trips frm the lift to the office.. but now 1 table and we will only nid 1 trip frm the lift le..

12th July 2005 - Tuesday (3 more days to seeing you)

2005-07-12T23:35:00.000+08:00

I found this song by A1 meaningful - Heaven by Your SIde
it brings back alot of memories past and present. I really cant wait to see you every weekends.

You and I, cannot hide the love we feel inside, the words we need to say. I feel that I have always walked alone.But now that you're here with me, there'll always be a place that I can go.

Suddenly our destiny has started to unfold. When you're next to me I can see the greatest story love has ever told. Somebody to keep the dream alive. The dream I found in you.

I always thought that love would be the strangest thing to me. But when we touch, I realise that I found my place in heaven by your side. I could fly, when you smile. I'd walk a thousand miles to hear you call my name.

Now that I have finally found the one who will be there for me eternally my everlasting sun. When you're next to me I can see the greatest story love has ever told. I realise that I found my place in heaven by your side.

9th of July

2005-07-09T22:02:00.000+08:00

9th of July - Saturday

todae is the 5th week that Dear dear is out of camp and a new week of the month. Well..... it's going to be like this fer 2 years..... he comes back over the weekends and back in camp during the weekdays.

Indeed, the 1st 2 weeks of confinement is the toughest times coz it is 14 daes that we will not be seeing each other. The longest period of time that we are separated being together fer 5 years....

Actually wanted to go town to shop but the sun is too blazing hot... wah liao, until i haf migraine... so we slept the entire afternoon. Sometimes it is a good ting to stay at home over the weekends to rest rather than to go all the wae town and squeeze ourselves in the crowd in this kind of weather..haha...

then now lehz....Mr Porky is surfing the web on information about his favourite hobby lorz ---- FISHING.... haiz.... he is so crazy over fishing until he is willing to pay $50 fer 3 hrs of fishing... that is him!

I suddenly realise 1 thing that i want to comment here... which is that when a ger knows that her guy fren is attached and yet continues trying to be funny... then she is a BITCH...

4 more daes to go...haha

2005-06-29T22:33:00.000+08:00

a piece of good news, my leave has been granted (5/7/05) that's mean i can accompany Dear the whole dae...haha...

Okiez...one more angry thing todae ar... coz my fren's ex-bf (dun wan to mention names lar hor) happily put words in pple's mouth that we went to mess ard wif his gf's blog.. for their info, we are not your "number 1 xian yi fan' lorz... dun alwaz cum barking like dogs non-stop and create a scene in front of us**so paisei .... furthermore we haf better tings to do in the office and out of office hours alright....WHU CARES.... but bo bian lehz... some pple are so shameless... haiya...and fer goodness sake... whu noes went to mess ard her blog...some more still went to confront Angelia... (my Poly best fren ar)

Shit... if wan...call direct to my hp lar...come out to tok out straight lorz.... look at whu is being childish... (esp dun nid to specially go complain ur bf and sae "see wad ur ex-gf and her frens has done")

Anywae, if want to blog..then dun scared others to meddle with your blog... if not then might as well close the account. Wah liao.... so difficult mehz... bird brains

OKiez... that's all fer now... I know that some KPO pple will drop by here to read my blog... but WHu Cares

Big Sobzz.....Dear is not coming back over the weekends.....

2005-06-27T23:36:00.000+08:00

received a call frm Mr Porky.... he sae he not coming home over the coming weekends...so sadz....sobz sobz.... muz wait till nxt week... look so much forward to nxt week... i will be waiting fer Dear Dear...hehehe

Porky's back in Camp...sobzzzz

2005-06-26T22:43:00.000+08:00

sobz sobz....derek's back in Tekong liao...haiya...another boring start of the week now...tml will be the 4th week i am working in iWOW.... and also dear's 1st month spent in Tekong..

Well... we are still in the midst of adjusting ourselves to the current lifestyle that the both of us are leading...beri different.. 1 serving NS and the other working...sianz man...wrk and wrk...slog and slog... but perhaps 1 week will pass faster this wae...then it's another week gone... and the story repeats itself...

HAHA....it's fridae nite again..(1st fri that i am wrkg @ Clinic)

2005-06-24T23:32:00.000+08:00

well pple...this is the 1st fridae (after working this F/T job)that i actually spent alone without my frens (angelia & maria..whu else?) haha..actually wanted to rush home to rest but then last min mum called me to on duty tonite coz my colleague (Ruzi)her daughter met wif an accident lor..then some more this month i've burnt a veri big hole in my bank lor...(esp ever since i joined this company - iWOW Technology) then like tis one lar...shitz...

haiz...tml Jingyi's bdae i also haven got time to buy a present fer her...aiyo... haha...

then mondae die liao lor...Lucia's(the ger whom i am taking over) gone! I die liao lar...i also like buay steady pattern..also duno how to die ehz...i juz pray tat overtime i will get better and hope that my bosses wun get impatient wif me...coz i admit i am a Slow person...then worse of all...i am a blur queen lor....haiz....sobzzzz....

To Dear,

derek... i know i was never wrong to haf known u and ask u out fer a morning jog that dae 5 years and 2 months ago... i nv regretted... you've been more responsible fer ur actions and a fren(angelia) once told me a truly good guy to reply on is one that will take care of the aged, his parents and his other half... i am glad u've fulfilled all those criterias...

ThInKIng of YOu every Moment...

2005-06-21T00:26:00.000+08:00

haha....another dae has gone.... hope all those Mondae Bluez will be gone as well...

well....todae also a beri tiring dae fer me lar....coz got to rush down Central Clinic....then it was so crowded in the clinic the entire evening until i got to drag my restless body home...leg pain....back pain...everywhere pain lar...so shitty....

Then derek called me a couple of times todae....the bad news: he sae he'll only be back sat afternoon.....sobz

Yeah......Finally He's Back

2005-06-18T13:34:00.000+08:00

Now...i hope Sundae dosent cum at all....haha...coz i dun wan to see him back in camp again! But then again, it isnt possible lar...unless he AWOL...haha...Finally, can see him le....went to have supper at Geylang then to ECp to njoy the breeze but then it was high tide the tym we went...haiz...so din manage to stay long.

Yupz....he's changed...looks better and slim down abit also...and he's definately darker. haiz...poor dear, still have sunburn lor....sobzz............

Get to know yourself better

2005-06-16T22:27:00.000+08:00

Your view on yourself:

You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.
The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.
Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:

Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.
Your views on education

You may not like to study but you have many practical ideas. You listen to your own instincts and tend to follow your heart, so you will probably end up with an unusual job.

The right job for you:

You have many goals and want to achieve as much as you can. The jobs you enjoy are those that let you burn off your considerable excess energy.
How do you view success:

You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:

You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:

You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

ahahah....Derek's home soon!!Cheerz...

2005-06-15T23:58:00.000+08:00

haha...another abt 48 hrs...can see that fatty leh....yes.....i miss him so much..been so busy wrking that's y i haven been blogging...okie...finally the dae has cum...oopsy....i haven learnt how to make baked rice yet..how???shitz

It's only 5 daes...

2005-06-08T23:43:00.000+08:00

it's only been 5 daes that u've went to Tekong but it seems so long....times passes slow..of course! Been tinking of you every single minute...alwaz go out after wrk coz i dun wish to be reminded of Lonliness and perhaps I would prefer to wrk clinic to earn some extra pocket $$ than to go straight home...hahhaa...become $$ face also le (but whu will find $$ more)

going to wrk every morning is a veri dreadful ting... everything also duno... so scared that i'll make mistakes but only thru mistakes will one learn rite...and obstacles are put there not to deter u but to encourage u to overcome them (Derek used to tell me which I alwaz use to encourage myself whenever i met wif those)

this saturdae i will be wrking frm 1pm onwards...all the wae to Sundae after 1pm...so i will also be 24 hrs...let me calculate the pay....

Central Clinic: 20 hrs x $7 = $140
Healthway: 4.5 hrs x $9 = $40.50
Total: $180.50....ahahahahaha.....can go shop again.....

Endless Miss & Care....

2005-06-07T00:44:00.000+08:00

Derek....my 1st dae working there...not used to having so many guys ard in the office.... HOw are u?? Training tough?? I am alwaz waiting fer ur fone @ night....but sometimes u are too busy to call....sobz... I really looking forward to the 17th lehz...i've already mentioned so many times here and there le...but the daes juz seem longer.... and i am already trying to occupy my time wif story books and eating Pastamania wif my goodies frens...haha...i enjoy shopping wif those gers.... and the after effect is a big hole in my bank when I am still at the Beginning of the month...omg...Help....

The Big Dae that Finally has Arrived...

2005-06-03T17:15:00.000+08:00

todae is the dae that Derek's got to be enlisted and to be confined in an offshore camp fer 2 weeks.... he'll be back by 17th June and hopefully I can see him the minute he step onto the main island.

I really miss him... even b4 we parted at the Tekong Jetty... omg that kind of feeling was undescribable... felt separated... and I cant even finish 1/2 the plate of herbal chicken rice which was served to us there...

Haha... since when haf I become so emotional... but I guessed it should haf been the case and I should ought to noe that... whether now or later, he'll still need to be enlisted and get separated fer the 1st 2 weeks. Well... as long as we cherish our time together and haf each other in our heart...i am already more than happy. Life's got to continue and definately he'll be more busier than me in the camp (coz they haf a whole long list of activities waiting fer them everydae).... so I got to get busy wif mine as well... hehe... he really noe wad i wanted or want coz this entire blog is designed by him... see the Little Mort... he is my fav character in the movie "Madagascar" ..isnt he cute?? Thank you, Dear.. i'll take care of myself frm now onwards..... I love you

the dae b4....

2005-06-03T03:14:00.000+08:00

so finally we cum to this stage whereby we are spending our last moment together b4 a guy gets himself confined in an island fer 2weeks...erm...a good whole 5 yrs that we've been together...or perhaps we had alwaz been sticking ard all these yrs...i felt so so sad...cant discribe that kind of feelings... alot of times tears were about to flow...but i told myself to stop being stupid okie... it's only 2 weeks...that we wouldnt be seeing each other... not 3 months confinement or wad.... so take it easy!! (but i find it so hard) some of my goodie frens had their bf cuming out in late June while me .... i got to wait till June 2007 which is 2 years later ....okie 2 years not long...fine!

then he send me to the 2nd interview.... near Hougang... (Serangoon North) em..finally got myself a perm job... so my frens sae at least i found myself something to do and perhaps would not anyhow tink etc... em... i guess i would definately missed him terribly...sobz.... and i am trying hard to look on the brighter side of tings okie....
afterwhich we went fishing at about 5pm...reach the ulu ulu fishing pond at ard 6pm.. and all the wae we fished till 9.30pm.. well todae's not a good catch... (somemore 3 hrs $50) hmmm.... actually got 3 fishes but they got away b4 we took them up to the "shore". Derek was of course beri disappointed but afterall it was an interesting experience over that side.. and i got to admit the fishes are indeed beri tricky orh....but anywae really hope he enjoyed his dae.....in another few more hrs is the big dae fer him.... hope he has got everything ready....i love you, Dear. I promise to wait fer u right...dun worry!!

hahaha.....3 daes to go

2005-06-01T16:48:00.000+08:00

Derek's still sleeping...bet he muz be damm tired coz Wilson's bike was tampered wif and tt fellow stole the motor seat....but luckily he left the driver seat intact...(so that he can still get help??) haha..then derek went msia wif him to fix the bike lorz...

haiz...then b4 that actually met up wif CK, Collin, Weiguang fer a chat...haiz...sounds boring man...the chat i mean!! Haha...then my 'daddy' which is Ck drove me ard hougang and sengkang b4 finally sending me home.... then i waited fer Derek's Call until 6am...but then he din call me...guess he tot i am already aslp bahz...haiz...

4 daes more...

2005-05-31T04:28:00.000+08:00

haiz...another dae gone... and getting nearer to 3rd june...xianz lorz...

went to Msia... fun..coz Singapore too small to go rounding anywae... things are pretty cheap there.... but dun really dare drink their water lorz... erm... yesterdae we spent out entire dae together...went to meet up wif Limbo @ TIong Bahru..hahaz...manage to catch the Madagascar....it was Really fun and hilarious and the most impt thing is little MOrt is soooooooooo damm cute lorz... wif 2 big round eyes.... so cute. Then went to ECP cos we tot we could go there and njoy the sea breeze like the other time we went there at 3/4 am. But yesterdae was so diiferent...we couldnt lie on the sand coz beri high tide ehz.... sianz lor...still kena mosquitoes bite...then after that go 401 haf breakfast afterwhich go to the Punggol Park b4 landed up at Derek's house.... again... haha... cant imagine if Derek going into camp soon... how am i going to spend my nights... by then i tink i got to learn to slp as early as possible so that i wouldnt want to eat supper etc... okie...gtg slp le.... nitez. I love you Dear...slp tite

5 more daes.....

2005-05-29T20:27:00.000+08:00

todae is a rainy dae to begin wif....weather's so good to sleep at home.... suddenly got cravings fer the Mache... but Derek wanted to go Gelare.... fer their ice-cream waffle.... haiz yo...i dun like waffles.... lehz....okie...got to get ready to go out wif him now and cherish the time spent... byez

6 more Days to Go.... 3rd June 2005

2005-05-29T01:35:00.000+08:00

Huhz...another 6 more daes b4 ur BMT.... sobz sobz... surely gonna miss u like Hell....ermz....i really wan to thank you fer sending me and waiting patiently fer me outside the company...i noe it was a hot dae.... my heart pained to see u like tt.... haha..hope u like the D.I.Y pouch and remember to post the pic into my blog k...and also Fifi's photo.... u haven upload ours lehz....erm....lets go fishing at Changi 1 of these daes b4 ur BMT starts okiez....haha....i noe u love Fishing alot and now u gt the chance to fish all u want....hehe....I noe ur love hasnt changed all these yrs... i feel really touched than u buying me another Diamond ring....Really!!

Disgressing in the Dark when somebody reading each other blog????????

2005-05-29T00:59:00.000+08:00

and after the misunderstanding Derek told me this which actually made me felt regretful and sad fer all tt happen...if only i had hold back my anger at that F*cker.... wad is most infuriating was that he insulted Derek.... and said"ask Derek to pay me back the $12 Derek has owned.... if no $$ then dun cum out larz etc etc..." omg....these kind of words actually came out frm F*cker's mouth whom Derek has alwaz tot tt he is a fren whu is alwaz helpful to his frens.. physically and financially.... but whu noes that he actually sought fer payment of the petty $12 ... straight into my face over the fone.... wad a big laughter.... so wad ..insulted Derek until like this ar?? maybe tt dae if this were not coming out frm his mouth..at least Derek would not feel much hurt and may not had led to all these arguements building up again.... will fren tok in this manner?? I dun tink so!

wads the point of someone saying let bygones by bygones...... when in fact he cant even do it himself... he is upset of wad pple's commented in their own blog.... that is wad a blog actually....filling all ur personal feelings and tots into a BLog.... wad is meant by do no Disgress in the Dark...pls ....not everyone 'bua song' will go ard leaving useless tag in pple's blog nameless.... okiez.... and i dun tink all these are being "Disgressing in the DARK" coz like i said a blog is over the Internet... i believe u noe whu u are if u are reading this and pls wake up ur idea....Maybe anybody reading this may not noe this....fer ur info: Derek hates it when someone tries to verbally 'attack'or try to be funny wif his Gf (which is me larz).... he really hate it and perhaps why tings turn out this wae todae is bcoz of wad somebody had done to his most beloved gf...and VIce Versa!!

Last but not least.... i dun gif a Damm of wad u guys tot abt me now and/or in the past(as Derek's gf) whether good or bad opinions.... coz some of Derek's fren may haf known me fer as long as 3-5 years but not noe how nasty i can be.... if it concerns Derek and i which i would nid to speak.

i've already said my piece and considered the consequences....

Perhaps Derek may not turn up at the small gathering u've all had.... but u all still can enjoy urselves bahz.... and his blog may sound really angry but he isnt those whu bear grudges.... juz as long as there isnt any verbal 'attacks' he'll be fine....

To the MOst Fucking Blurest Cork in Singapore (the one whu left a tag):

2005-05-28T02:52:00.000+08:00

whu is he/she to tell me or wad not to write and sae....BUZZ off larz... u are not WELcome to my blog..this is my world... u can jolly well enjoy the critisms i made but dun bother to leave any comments here... wad is the more funny ting is that Fucker dun even haf the GUTS to leave a NAme... but then also dun bother to leave ur name larz...coz i am not interested to even noe whu the BLOODY HELL u are... kao pei...leave me and Derek alone..

7 days more....

2005-05-28T02:18:00.000+08:00

haiz...1 dae closer to 3rd June..xianz...but then todae paydae..went shopping like hell...but Derek's abit tired...sadz ... oso duno wad will happen when Derek's in camp..

Guess things are alwaz unpredictable juz as todae we are still best frens and tml we fall out wif each other... but 1 ting fer sure "good frens dun leave u alone" but some claims that they dun when they did... frens ought to haf Trust ... and not look down on those whu dun own a car or leave a terrace... and frens dun put words into pple's mouth....

Derek's choice to keep shut abt the 'misunderstanding' was not a wise one though... but a more generous wae of doing things bahz...coz those whu knew him noe that he isnt the sort whu would create more stories ... and esp those whu had knew Derek frm Monfort or those whom he knew since YEar 1 in NYP.... these pple ought to noe Derek than to hear wad others had got to sae over the matter... coz some pple are adding salt + pepper to the story and making matter worse.... or had even angered Derek intentionally....

Frankly speaking... wads wrong wif the party keeping mum abt the matter? wad does silence indicate? Guilty? I tink is a more Generous and Mature wae of handling the matter...to prevent it frm getting worse... though it is not wise of him.. human nature is that they tend to listen to gossip and rumours and most slightly even believed...only those whu really Knew him would get to noe wad he is trying to do... sad to sae... none has the Foresight or even Brains to noe wad he is trying to prevent.... they juz wan to noe why, wad and how it all happen....

Friends??? Isit worth Mentioning??

2005-05-25T23:16:00.000+08:00

haha....todae's a gd dae for blogging coz gt alot of stuff to mention..okie. Me shall start wif the happy ones first.

todae Dear brought me to NYP to get my transcript...(he is alwaz so good to me..coz i lost the original)..hehe afterwhich we headed to Msia..JB (should be better than go 'rounding' at nite wif some stupid fools whu tinks they are Saints or 10 'xiongdis'??
Haha...friends?? Can they last ferever?? Well..dun wish to mention abt those pple 1st...let me continue wif the nice trip to JB...we went to the $$ changer @ mSia...then go up all the wae to this place called Angsana. Aiyah..this place @ JB lar...went shopping & ate @ Kenny Rogers..it was nice. Fantastic dinner..Chicken was grilled wif Black peppers wif 3 side orders and the ting worth mentioning is the tenderness of the chicken meat. B4 we return to Singapore..went to Shell..haha..it was a nice trip wif him b4 he gt enlisted!!

oh that dae we went to catch AMITYVILLE....em...okie lar...tink the next one we will catch is Stars Wars...we also went to ECP...it was nice though we are abit worn out... but it was really nice listening to the sea roar... rather than going to some 'stupid' chalet looking aft those drunkards...whu tinks tt they can drink pretty well and maybe need to change a liver soon...

Okie...now regarding some fools staying in Hougang and few in Sengkang...okie...wan to read my blog...GO AHEAD...but pls plssss not get hot on ur heels and emit smoke frm ur ears/head... Listen up...this is a Blog..means it gets published over the Internet and anyone can see this....and some more all along i tink that GUYS are more generous than Gers??? But maybe some bunch of partial 'non-grown-up' guys are this wae lar... read already gt abit 'buay song' lorz....but also cant help it lar... it is in THEM. Maybe that is wad keeps them going as a CLICK... erm...i heard that Guys whu cant tolerate a ger's critism wouldnt make a Good Husband wor....hahaa

I suppose writing in my personal blog isnt 'backstabbing' rite?? hmm..some morons tink that it is the case... like mentioned abv... it is posted over the INTERNET mahz... noe wad is Internet?? and if i wan to backstab some unworthy pple...i wouldnt be so dumb to do it in my blog coz i noe some morons will look into mine btw me by doing so is already 'Guang Ming Zhen Da' liaoz... haiz...the chest too narrow ar...cant stand ....then Jolly well get angry or hot lorz...

Oh yah..another thing rite... i dun quite understand wad is meant by "a Lust of Smoke" but then i noe whu is regarded as True Frens and Whu dosent WORth to even mention the word Fren.. those pple..u noe whu u are hor...dun nid mention names lar... AS fer myself...if u step on my tail and disturb my beloved Derek..u wun get 'bitten' by me rite... juz that some f*cker out there like to ACT as if they are RIGHT... they are alwaz RIGHt and add Salt, Pepper and CHilli or maybe OIl 2 Fire... make the matter worse lar.. but those f*ckers whu did those are most probably the one whu likes riding a RED Ni'March and another living in a terrace along JC rd... not to mention names again...

oh btw...God truly gives us a 2nd chance to live by sacrificing himself on the cross and we shouldnt bear grudges and in fact be FORGIVING rite?? hmmm... me tink so too....after being in a COnvent fer 10 long years...but at least wad i gt to sae and wanted to mention is all in this page and not else where... unlike some others where CHinese often sae they like to 'zhao yao sheng fei'..and esp those whu are wrong in the 1st place likes to argue tt they are the Right ones...(wad? Think the 2 of u are the WRight Brothers...well...maybe in ur next next life...haahahahaa) In chinese..these pple are named as 'Er Ren Xian Gao Zhuang'...haiz perhaps..Derek has offended a number of Xiao Ren in this year bahz....his long time frens sort of like walked out of him fer an AVERAGE rich bastard and a lowly character riding a Ni'March...haha...

if those 10 'xiong di' were to stand in front of him...haha...i really feel like giving each a 1 tight slap... wake up ur idea men...

Lost My Hello Kitty File

2005-05-21T00:19:00.000+08:00

haiz.....coming to end of May 2005 le...read frm the newspaper tt 116 couples chose to get married on this dae...perhaps 200505 is easy to rem bahz....

Aiyoz....me lost my Pink color Hello kitty file..inside contains all impt doc eg O level cert, transcript and Accounting Challenge cert etc....sobz...WHY???? Why isit happening on me...the worse is i cant even remember tt i've brought it out....i tot i saw it lying ard the hse last wk...??? ARggggggggggGGG!!!!! Cant even go fer interviews le.

my feelings.....

2005-05-16T03:30:00.000+08:00

yaya...if wan to go rounding then dun so hamji mahz...juz passby a deserted rd then scared until dun dare to go home..omg...wad a group of frens...haha

Back frm Gardens....it was damm Bored wif them....wad the....

2005-05-16T03:02:00.000+08:00

well...we went to pet shop to shop fer my chin's (Fifi) mobile cage. Went to Upp Serangoon then to Serangoon Gardens...hehe...Derek wanted to buy the cage fer me...but i tink it is not feasible...so we din make the purchase. Had dinner there...it was so fantastic but we both nearly puke (shouldnt haf order tt much) hehe...we reached home ard 9pm and tot it will be another dae gone and another dae nearer to Dear's enlistment dae... However, we met up wif derek's sec sch frens JOvan, Alvin ( i duno this person), Collin and his ger fren....which i find the entire conversation there so sucky.. JOvan's quite a joke. While i observe Derek toking to Collin, i cant help feeling that sometimes my dear is so innocent and his 'fren' collin is tt too wise or Cu...haaha...better not to tink so much...well Alvin drives and they were mentioning abt those bastards with the $ sign on their face and a birdie brain who tot tt they haf all the time and money in the world to be cocky...rounding abt wif 3 cars which i tink is a Complete WASTE of Singapore's resources to haf bred these f*ckErs....

ya...but come to tink of it.....will he be missing out all those fun should nothing haf ever happen and abt the staring incident...erm...but i still tink that the rich btd is juz trying to act rich and funny which is not the case. Yupz... maybe all his so called 'true frens' (in the past)haf all jz turned agst him and walked towards the one who has $ with no brains... i feel so sad and sorry but not fer those f*ckers but fer my Dear...he is such a nice guy, a real fren who nv hesitate to help his 'frens' but to no avail.

from wad i see, all those big hangouts we used to haf in the past (2 mths back) are all bullshit. Perhaps God is trying to wake us up by these incidents that they arent true frens to rely on...they arent someone Derek can turn to fer help and is definately not worth the mention 'friend'...coz frens dun walk out of each other....

Dear Lord, take away our fear of loneliness in this period. Take away hatred and bring us joy that we used to feel. Let us feel your love and presence. Fer thee, i asked of you. Amen

9 May 2005...another dae @ Bikini Bottoms..hahaha

2005-05-10T02:00:00.000+08:00

a fresh new dae of the week...woke up at abt 12.45pm todae..poor dear gt to wrk and wait fer his target at Tiong Bahru...todae is a hot dae...though the pay is high but he mz wrk so hard fer it..pains my heart..i bought him his lunch..omg...he muz be starving by the time i reach there at 3pm...sobz...and so we finish the job at 4.30pm b4 we head fer Hougang...(my fav place on earth)

Well...i've been wif him fer like most of the tym and though i alwaz get scolded fer being home so late ...i dun mind...coz..perhaps in a few weeks tym...i wouldnt haf the chance to see him day + nite....i've alwaz enjoy my dae wif him...he is the one whu brought me joy, laughter but also sadness all these years...hehehe..bu he is also the one whu has changes my mentality...i guess i am no longer the soft spoken, timid one i used to be...haha...fer me...i still prefer to be the little ger i used to be...not now

then..in the nite..he said he was bored...din wan to go home tt early (it was abt 11pm++)wanted to find somebody out etc...he said he gt not much frens...that sentence made me recall wad had happened... i started to feel the regret and regret is nv in my dictionary, perhaps i shouldnt haf done all those...made him so frendless...so lonely..those whom i would describe as one wif human head but 'birdbrain'and likes to cum up birdie and crapy ideas..wadever it is....i really hope that the ALmight will take away Derek's lonliness...sadness...emptiness...to thee, i pray. Amen

a Day @ OCBC, Raffles Place....6th May 2005

2005-05-06T23:51:00.000+08:00

the reason why I am writing all these happenings into this personal blog that Derek has created fer me....(a.k.a Sexy Kid) coz they are all moments wif Derek, although he is wrking..but i dun mind by juz following him ard...haha..

So the dae started @ 6am.
7am i am already waiting @ the Fernvale LRT fer 'William'
haha..then hor....Derek was supposed to identify him and call my mobile to inform me..then...i saw him at the LRT..(i was so shocked at tt tym...i looked @ the person until the person was like wondering y is this lady in black looking at me etc)

but lost 'William' stupidly lar ..in the end... haiz...sadz..then we had our breakfast at B.K ard 10am..haha..it was nice...I really cherish the time together wif Derek.

a Fun Day from Lorong CHuan ~ Tiong Bahru

2005-05-05T03:24:00.000+08:00

hahaha...it's already 5/5/05...triple 5...but anywae...10 hours ago juz follow my bf to wrk...tracking somebody's mistress down. Wow, that lady was so damm rich, wondering is her wealth or the guy's. SHe is living in a 3 storey terrace at Lorong CHuan but then she moved to a condo at TB..we followed her the entire afternoon...haha..it was fun. (of course lar...coz wif my dear dear mahz)...hahaha...but tat was 4/5/05..

3/05/05...1.15am --- we had our supper @ BK in Changi Airport...interesting ar?...went wif Derek and his colleague (WIlson)...actually wanted to haf Swensens at the airport but then it was unfortunately not 24hrs...so we went T1 to haf our meal...ahhahaa...

haiz..also duno aft 3rd of June...wad am I supposed to do wifout my dear...sobz sobz...i will be like a lonely ghost larz...sadz...

Another thing to add...

2005-05-01T03:24:00.000+08:00

To Angelia..

Stop looking at mine coz it is longer than 1000 words essay and it involves my personal emotions lehz...paisei one okiez.....

To Dear Derek:

Hope we can stilll haf time to slack @ home ...at nite eat CHeese + Paper + Plaster + Egg + Butter Pratas ....lying on the bed toking craps also beri fun...I miss them all!!

Okiez....good nite..Sweet Dreams

the dae @ Swensen's....30th April 2005

2005-05-01T02:48:00.000+08:00

well...todae's last dae of April. Derek brought me to Swensen's...coz he sae last time I alwaz sae wanted to go but din haf the chance to...and so it was a wondrous dinner there...he fulfilled my dreams...but then the both of us find that Swensen's ice-cream (& FIsh & Chips) is super NORMAL, nothing special!! I told him I still prefer going to Sushi Tei...but Derek, you dun bother to bring me there lar...go there alwaz so expensive & ur $$ is so hard-earned. I tink you might not noe this or perhaps too busy to even haf time to look at this blog coz you din even haf time to update urs...tonite I am really happy. I know you've done all those to make me feel happy. Yupz...feels fortunate to haf such a caring & thoughtful bf.

you alwaz ask me wad's bothering me...wads the problem or why do I look so sad..and I alwaz sae "nothing lar, I am alrite" but that is not all....I juz regretted wad I shouldnt had told you that dae at Uncle Joe, ECP and Changi V...how I wish i can take back all those hurtful words....how I would wanted so much to happily sae:"REALLyyyyyyy..." (in Bob's tone) but juz couldnt do it these few daes ever since that incident. Perhaps we din haf enuf time to sit down and slowly tok abt these...or afraid that when i started toking you would be fast aslp.... I din mention to you this coz i duno how to put across to you and whenever i wanted to tell u, u alwaz tell me u are very tired to guess wad's on my mind and wad u can do to make me happy again...dear..its not wad i wan and sae that you go do it, i'll be fantastically happy...simply by being wif you....sitting beside you in the cinema already warms my heart. Sometimes, i really dun dare to let you noe wad am I feeling...coz i am afraid u will find me silly or nothing better to do....tink of wad has already happened etc..ya

After all and all, haf you ever wonder the kind of pain when u said " i juz cant tok to you" i feel that kind of miscommunication that existed between us...and I dun wan to feel this wae....

I noe i was in the wrong to alwaz sae angry words which i dun mean to...I am SORRY...I noe u love fishing more than i love shopping....ya..i am a lousy gf...coz i din noe u are sooo tired aft ur job...which i am supposed to noe coz u are my closest dar dar...sorry, i juz got carried away to shop hahaha...duno wad to do now...it's alrite..i'll wait till u haf the time and energy..nitez....rest well!!

stiLL enjoying my 'holidays'..heheehe

2005-04-29T03:47:00.000+08:00

okiez...my grandma's here 2 stay wif me fer 1 week and i got to type softly coz she is juz behind me Zzzz away...(cant afford 2 wake her up arh)..

Yupz...the '5th anni' has juz been over, unforgetable! I begin 2 realize I cherish 'him' more & more since that dae lar..at ECP...romantic...we talk thru along the seaside..enjoying the sounds of the waves slapping the shores...sound of breeze...and the restaurant by the waters seem so cool...really wan 2 go der and really enjoy the ambience..(ya...hope we can go there again b4 he goes NS)...sianz...after he go NS ar..duno whu will take care of me..listen 2 my naggies...hear my cold jokes...(cz everytime tell him jokes, he dun find funny so I tink my jokes r too cold fer him)

To Derek:

Dear...dun nid wrk so hard (overwrk) ....coz I cant bear the pain not able to see u...hear u tok cork and play PS2 wif me ehz...

I see u day + night wrk ...so ...i feel the pain....feel that ur $$ is really hard earned one lorz...(i mean better dun anyhow spend lar)...also duno when we can haf the chance to slack at home liaoz..since now u gt to follow a 'old lady + ABC'...

But wadever it is..dun wrk so hard lorz...earn jz enuf 2 spend can le..cz u going NS soon...should enjoy and not overwrk...

LAstly, I wan to let u noe that I Love You wif each passing dae...and I really enjoy 23 APril wif u...all these years...and I nv regret having to know you.

then this week is super busy fer me arh...GM cum and stay, gt to look after her then gt to wrk p.t CA then gt to go interviews....wah liew...waste my transport lor...also duno which company will hire me ehz..wif my expected salary....haiz haiz...God, have mercy!!

To Ah Chai:

then my good fren cum good colleague kena sacked by the company -dun wan mention names b4 i get 'sut' which she is supposed to wrk temp fer 2 weeks..then that stupid company lay her off b4 the 1st week..omg...wad a petty and lousy firm to wrk fer,still claim to be an MNC..kena SAI...then my dear fren was too sad and shocked to receive the 'bad' news..heard her sorrows..feels sorry and also scared it might happen on me....the employers nowadaes are so scary....come on....we dun own them, we jz own a living lorz..so dun be too overly upset.

To Angelia:

This ger rite...is currently wrking...busy wif her AP stuff larz...haiz..hopes she faster settle in and not hanging in the air...perserverance is impt fer her...cz during the 1st dae of wrk already tink of 'running' or 'charbow' the company liaoz...haiyo...dun feel disheartened by the wrk load..tink of wad u will gain in terms of knowledge + exp of course!!All the best to you..cheerz...

23rd April 2005... 5 yrs ago it was a start of a beautiful fairytale

2005-04-23T02:09:00.000+08:00

16 APRIL 2005.....4.50am

2005-04-16T04:49:00.000+08:00

oooo...It's a Sat morning liaoz...4.50am. Derek saes this blog may be too ugly fer me to pin down my tots and play wif this little diary of mine..hehe..he had jz sent me a link...perhaps he is tinking of changing a 'new look' fer my blog...its was fantastic..i like the ger in the pic beri much...jz that I din tell him.

Haf alot of things to tell him lehz...but hor...duno y I cant get it off my chest, my mouth. Hahaaa...we tok thru alot thru msn now...I understand wad he means now...hope he understands mine too! (reeeallyyyy...muz imagine the tone i alwaz use ok??..tink only derek noes)He is going NS soon...haiz...will surely miz u lots...like hell...haiz haiz

Todae also went fer Job interviews at the agency in Orchard..sianz man...still got to crawl back to hg to wrk...cant shop at my fav place..which is orchard rd lorz....

Hope i get to chance to shop from dae to nite again...beri long since i've ever done that...(previously wif my another best fren...shopping kaiki-SUYI)

To Derek...you are the BEST bf ever...cheers to our 5 years anni..23 April 2005...
To Suyi...I miss u alot....shoppping together i mean.
To Angelia...hope u can get a job soon...to save ur mum's nagging and burning a hole in your pocket...
To Maria...dun get so uptight in getting a job..good jobs needs time to find
To Dad...take care of ur health
To Mum...Sorie fer alwaz making u worry..ahhaa

Things are Getting Clearer....

2005-04-13T03:56:00.000+08:00

Me blogging again. Juz came back frm JK..love the cheese prata..fantastic...it is alwz a 'no fail' order frm me and also the 'rose syrup + lime'...haha, me favourite.

Haven been toking to my parents...cz i alwaz go home late and even when i am at home...i lock myself in my room...etc..kind of miss the 2 old folks...

Finally i got an answer frm him abt 'that' incident...jz wonder how cum 'some'gers are so 'fan jian' (adapted frm Ms Kelly Lum)or they juz duno their limits...when pple already has a steady gf...but i tink LOVE is not wrong...its not her fault if she likes him....rite? So kelly ask me..."then why should get so angry over her....jz let her be, let her continue to act stupid etc lar?"

I was really infuriated, sad and almost torn apart the 1st time but my all these subsided when 'he' appear outside my clinic waiting again patiently. He is alwaz like this....no matter how long it takes me...he will jz wait. Maybe pple thinks he looks like a fool but this is wad makes all my negative feelings i have had the entire dae diminish....he ask me to go over his house....accompany him fer the nite b4 his exams on Wednesday...and so i went..there was a kind of assurance. Later he said he had plans to bring me fer holidaes after his exams..i was elated....at least it goes to show that he wants to share those special moments wif me...

Haiz...but noe wad....the bad news came...when he found out that he is enlisted fer his National Service this June...omg..its JUNE 3, 2005....guess i'll miss him to death....duno wad am i supposed to do also...hope that i wun cry the dae i sent him..ahaha...Fine..there goes our dream of travelling! But he promise we will spend time together perhaps on shopping and eating and lots of enjoying...ahahhaa...

okie...that's all fer todae...i got to go test him on theory again...nitez....

The Night My Heart Pump So Fast That I Was Unable To Sleep.....

2005-04-12T05:08:00.000+08:00

It's already 5.09am yet I am still so wide awake so i decided to blog. Mind was full of things that I was unable to sleep. WHY? I've found something that made me think of alot of things until I was unable to even close my eyes for 1 minute on the bed. Haha...

Tink I sound moody and sad these few daes....duno y nowadaes, I cant even hear myself laugh. OMG!! It was so nice in the past, Memories are still so fresh in my head...someone waiting fer me outside my school. He looks stupid, standing there waiting patiently but i noe he never regretted doing all these....sometimes he brought along a fren to look stupid as he does. But as time goes by, he comes alone and sometimes even wif flowers on his hands. My fav flower is not rose, its Sunflower. He knows and he used to pay attention to every word that comes out of my mouth. He used to be the quiet one...alwaz there listening (and also beri romantic, full of ideas) and I am the one toking. But now, he's been more hilarious. Yupz, i love the way he is in the past, I am alwaz so touched by wad he had done fer me....actually now also lar...whenever he has time, he will fetch me here and there etc....but recently, somebody had juz stepped into our lives. I duno when it all started but perhaps its been like 3 months or so? He even told me the other dae that he loves me alot and is the only that he will ever loves....hahaha...i was so so touched until i even cried and into his arms again....feels so secure and i almost felt melted.hahaha, stupid me again! The kind of feeling 3,4 years back...but it's hard to haf this kind of feelings nowadaes...esp....haiz! I juz hope i can get my normal sleeping hours back. Its so hellish...waking up everydae at 4 or 5pm. Ya....so I juz pop a sleeping pill so that later i would haf no problem sleeping. hehe.

Wad's left are his sweet memories to me, a diamond ring that he used 3/4 of his 1st salary @Robinsons to buy, those sms he sends to me on 10 and 11 April that I read these few daes so that i am able to sleep peacefully. Hope things will get better after his exams. Maybe by then, he will have time to spend on crazy tots and ideas on me. Haha...I still Love him and Alot...though i am not quite myself recently.

ya...juz now spoken to his best fren. It happened that his fren had told me over a fone conversation that he is looking for a job vacancy @ Robinsons which maybe i tink he todae too tired to even tok to me about this kind of small matter larz...then his fren sae y derek like studying at Hougang Green, Mac....but he told me is at Yishun, Mac....and how did she who stays at Sembawang go all the wae to Hougang Green...such a long journey....

K lar, the medicine seems to take effect liaoz....Nitez....God Bless

Falling Into You by Celine Dion

2005-04-11T03:28:00.000+08:00

And in your eyes i see ribbons of color
I see us inside of each other
I feel my unconscious merge with yours
And i hear a voice say, "what's his is hers"

I'm falling into you
This dream could come true
And it feels so good falling into you

I was afraid to let you in here
Now i have learned love can't be made in fear
The walls begin to tumble down
And i can't even see the ground

I'm falling into you
This dream could come true
And it feels so good falling into you

Falling like a leaf, falling like a star
Finding a belief, falling where you are

Catch me, don't let me drop!
Love me, don't ever stop!

So close your eyes and let me kiss you
And while you sleep i will miss you

I'm falling into you
This dream could come true
And it feels so good falling into you

Falling like a leaf, falling like a star
Finding a belief, falling where you are

feeling blue....duno y...

2005-04-11T02:23:00.000+08:00

well..todae is Sunday. Had quite a hectic dae coz my relatives came to my house. My mum had asked me to ask my boyfren (Derek) to send me to Serangoon Gardens to buy tat stupid famous 'Ah Seng' Roasted Duck. And so I went alone by cab coz i din wan to bother him wif tis stupid task. (he is having exams now mahz)And guess wad....that 'Ah Seng' roasted duck stall is closed...so my mum had still tot tat derek had been sending me...she asked me to go to the Serangoon Central branch...i took bus 317, it took me about 40mins to reach coz of the detouring inside those terrace houses in Serangoon Gardens....i was beginning to feel irritated and grumpy coz of the very very hot weather...and i am sweating like hell, yet i still haf to go to Serangoon Central to get a Roasted Duck home. As it goes, i alighted and went to the designated kopitiam that my mum had indicated. To my biggest surprise and shock, tat branch at Serangoon Central is not opened...OMG, i nearly go crazy on the spot. and so i took NEL to Kovan and went to the market, finally got a decent Roasted duck though not the fanous 'Ah Seng' one, i jz bought it home...Finally i am on my wae home...haha..i am so happy. But then while at Kovan MRT waiting to go home happily, I got onto the wrong direction...haiz...was too distracted over certain tings. In the end, it took me about 3.5 hrs to reach home.

I was pondering over things between me and him. Yupz...i was wondering am I being overly-sensitive or isit that i am jz nothing better to do. I really hope that God could give me a broader heart..so that i am not so narrow-minded.(Perhaps that's wad i appear to be) How I hope God could also take away all my Hatred, Anger and Hurt at that moment!!!! that nite though he offer explainations to those SMS...but i was not really convinced but deep in my heart i really hope all these had not happened. I was really Heartbroken, tears were uncontrollable. I could not get over myself how could i still allow myself to face him. haha....wad a lousy gerfren am I. I dun even remember myself doing anything that makes him happy so far and maybe i din noe how to....i alwaz feel that he noes me better than i do.

At the same time, i spoke to one of my best fren in secondary school daes.....she is one of those i considered 'zhihui' nuren. She has beri high EQ (IQ not sure)...she is a good listener as well as adviser...i love listening to her advices...I jz hope tat in the future daes to go i can be more sensible...i no longer wan to have those feelings of sadness and emptyness in me...i hate those. It makes me feel insecure. God Bless

My One Thousand & One Wish List

2005-04-07T04:05:00.000+08:00

Here it Goes:

1. 1 LV 'bao bao'
2. 1 90ml Hugo Deep Red Perfum
3. 1 90ml Polo Raulp Lauren Perfum
4. 1 Job that pays $1800 monthly (quite hard larz)
5. 1 Creative(ZEN) or Sony MP3
6. 1 Sony Slim pack Digicam
7. Go Msia Genting or Australia Perth with my Beloved (Even Harder)

yaya...that's all fer wad i can tink of...hehe..muz go earn more money to achieve all these lorz....$$$$$$$ is very important lorz...

A Song of Us....remember, that movie LArz..haha. But they dun appreciate????

2005-04-07T03:10:00.000+08:00

Lying beside you
Here in the dark
Feeling your heartbeat
With mine
Softly you whisper
You're so sincere
How could our love
Be so blind

We sailed on together
We drifted apart
And here you are by my side

So now I come to you
With open arms
Nothing to hide
Believe what I say
So here I am
With open arms
Hoping you'll see
What your love means to me
Open arms

Living without you
Living alone
This empty house seems so cold
Wanting to hold you
Wanting you near
How much I wanted you home

And now that you've come back
Turned night into day
I need you to stay

mY 1ST time......

2005-04-07T01:01:00.000+08:00

Hi everyone... this is my first time blogging. Duno wad to sae also lehz....but for 1 thing I am very sure is that I am so surprised to have this blog! It’s a surprise...coz I never expected to own 1 myself. I really wan to thank Derek and her sister, Joan for building this blog that solely belongs to me.

I thank God fer knowing Derek, a very close person who has been wif me thru all thick and thin during all these 5 years.... and his Family(although I din haf a good family background, that’s why I beri thankful to Almighty God) A lot of things..i jz din noe hw to express my gratitude and appreciation to him....hope he really noes how I’ve been feeling towards him....

Okie larz…stop all these mushy things! I going out fer supper wif my beloved now..Blog another time...

The First Post

2005-04-07T00:23:00.000+08:00

This blog is created for Candy.

Most of the work were done by me, Derek (and partially by my sister, Joan).

The easy ones are by me and hard ones are by my sister!!